Change

Change is something that has always made me uncomfortable. I find happiness in the things that are certain. I completely understand that change is inevitable and there is literally nothing I can do about. Change makes me a better person. I tend to get over comfortable with the way things go, and normally am in need of a change up, although I don’t want it. There haven’t been many things that have drastically changed in my life. The thought of change is what scares me.

In a few weeks, I’ll be turning 16. I’ve never really been a fan of celebrating my own birthday. The anxiety of having all eyes on me for a few hours isn’t my cup of tea. 16 is a scary age. You gain a lot of freedom, which comes with the bad side. Freedom is something that is definitely earned and is easily revoked. It’s some scary business, if you ask me.

It would be easy to say that I’m scared of growing up, because simply that is one of the biggest changes that has yet to come. From a young age, I’ve always been more in touch with those of my older peers. I find it easier to carry a conversation with adults than with those my age. The problem is that I’m afraid to be on my own. In nearly 2 years I will be embarking on “adulthood.” I will move out and go to college, hopefully. I already have my plan, which I’m fairly confident in. I’m afraid to fail in that plan though. I know that I’m supposed to put my trust into God, and know that He knows exactly what I need. I don’t doubt that He knows what to do, it’s just I’m afraid of things not working out as I planned. Faith is something that is scary, the only certain thing is that God knows what he’s doing. Regardless of whether you like it or not, God knows how things are supposed to be for you. The craziness of faith is one of the things that makes it so beautiful.

I have faith in God that he will make my path in life the one that is most necessary for me. With age, I hope on embarking on adventures that I couldn’t imagine myself achieving. Although change is scary, I want to take it head on with full confidence. As I mature, I plan on letting go and letting God. He is ultimately the only one with the greatest intentions for me, and I whole heartedly accept it.

Jeremiah 29:11 – “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.”